The Privilege of Acting Poor but Getting Rich
Last week, I came to the realization that within the last year, we moved somewhere from poor to middle class. I’m not quite sure what the line would be exactly, but that we crossed it. For me, it might have something to do with zero day. And it definitely has something to do with a change in mindset.
Part of that realization was the acknowledgement that our giving while existent, did not fit without our values system, and that we needed to seriously increase what we were giving in order to maintain a semblance of balance in what we profess and what we do.
Otherwise, I’d have to seriously reconsider the verbal activism I’m doing online. And I don’t want to do that. So upping the giving contributions it is!
But that also means reshifting our budget, yet again. UGH! One day, I will get this right (probably when I’m dead, though). It also means acknowledging that while we act poor, we’re accumulating wealth.
We’re The Perfect PF Starter Package
I think our income, enough to get by and make sincere project while also still feeling the confines of a limited monthly paycheck, is the demographic that the professional gurus talk about when they say “the poor can get rich”. That we just need to be smarter with our money, and save more, and separate bank accounts. All good advice, but only if you have that extra income like we do.
Feasibly, we live on $3800 a month, together. So let’s chop that in half for $1,900 for me, and $1,900 for him. Now, I have student loans, and he doesn’t. So lets move $150 from him to me. It costs me $2,150 to live a month, and $1,750 for my husband, all other things being equal. In California, the minimum wage is $12/hour. So, a full-time job would rake in $2,400. Before taxes. After taxes, it will be closer to $2,200.
That means, I barely make enough to live off of, and that fifty dollars extra I earned a month might not be enough to cover random expenses that came my way, even if I diligently saved them every month. My husband would be doing a little better than me. He’d make just enough to get by and potentially help me cover the last little bit of everything I needed to should money be tight. Some months, we wouldn’t have anything to save left over, others maybe $100-$200. And our budget is bare bones, we don’t even have Internet at our house. And we don’t eat out much. Our grocery bill is $200/month. And we don’t run the air conditioning. There’s not much more we could cut out.
Our life is very simple. We choose to live poor.
But we have the means to live poor. It’s ironic, in some ways, that you need the means to live poor. But we do. We have the means to live poor because we’re able to save approximately 30% of our gross income. We both invest in retirement accounts, we put $300 towards my student loans a month, and $1,000 towards our emergency fund and long term savings goals.
And that’s precious to me. Life altering.
It’s privilege. Privilege I hadn’t considered until recently. And it means I should be willing to give more. I live below my means, save my money, invest. All because I happened to land a job paying more than minimum wage.
I say happen to because I was applying to everything at that point. Coffee shops, car washes, Walmarts, anything that would supply a steadier income. The job I have fell into my lap, and launched us into financial security.
Acting poor gave us advantages.
At first, we were poor. When I was bringing in $200/month contract income, and we were both commuting almost an hour because the only place we could afford was outside the city limits. That’s what we did to survive. It taught us vital lessons we’ve carried into a more affluent life.
But it doesn’t give us the right to call ourselves poor anymore. We aren’t. We get to act poor, but we also get to reap the benefits of earning $60k a year. Again, not a lot, but when you frame your life around a minimum wage budget, the extra $30K a year makes a HUGE difference in what we’re able to accomplish financially.
We can listen to the advice spend less than you earn and invest the difference because we’re able to. Others can’t. Not because they’re lazy, or don’t work hard enough, or they don’t sacrifice enough. Believe me, living a life this simple is hard, and we have the ability for lifestyle inflation, minimum wage workers don’t. They’re not paid well enough, so they can’t move up the economic ladder. It’s not possible.
The bootstrap narrative in America runs deep.
Our country, in some ways, was founded on it. It’s a narrative I had handed to me as a kid, and my parents had handed to them. America is the land of promise, the land of dreams. The land where anything is possible.
Except, anything isn’t possible to low income earners. Because they simply don’t have enough money in their budget.
So, we need to ditch the bootstrap narrative. That anything is possible if you work hard enough. And think of a more collaborative solution. I don’t have a comprehensive solution to the problem. But I do have an answer: stop preaching a narrative that is impossible to some of our most vulnerable population. Elect officials who also see the wage dilemma and who are working with other leaders on solutions. Use your own money and donate to charities who help bring equality.
Don’t think that you’re riches come from sheer will power. They don’t. I can attest to that.
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[…] The Privilege of Acting Poor but Getting Rich – Moriah Chace […]
Hi there, Moriah.
I’ve been trying to write about the class mobility idea for a while and I think you’ve done a much better job of it here. There’s something to the idea of being able to choose to live wherever on the class scale you think is best, versus just being where you are because of how little you make. The choice is everything: it impacts our stress, how we feel about our finances, and gives us an autonomy: we’re making these spending choices, they’re not being foisted on us.
<3 I LOVE your blog, so it means a lot to me that you enjoyed this piece. I think I’m at a really unique place where I’ve had brushes with poverty and homelessness, but I was scrappy (and lucky) enough to come out of it on the other side… I definitely haven’t finished writing about this topic, and I’m spending time thinking through other ways both mindsets have affected the way I view money. But, I’m not quite ready to write about that yet. Thanks for stopping by!
I struggle with this idea every time I start to write a blog post. I know I’m writing from a place of privileged and my words won’t mean anything to those struggling to make ends meet. But I still feel strongly about sharing my story, so I go ahead and write that post.
With that said, I love the idea of relating this struggle to giving more especially towards helping close the income gap. You have me thinking about how I can up my giving game. Thanks.
Yes! It’s hard for me, too. Even though I’ve skirted with poverty. Because I know how insanely lucky I was and am that my husband and I can make ends meet.
I think it’s an important concept to grapple with, even as we write our own stories. I live in a decent apartment with three pets and my partner. Our life is simple, but we still have a lot of fun, and can afford to travel. And we’re blessed to be able to do that. I’m finally wrestling with my privilege. And it’s hard, but worthwhile.
I’m glad that my post has helped answer some questions to help alleviate the burden of wealth through potential increased giving. That always makes me happy to hear!
[…] At one point in my life, I had to be frugal. Now I feel cool being frugal. I don’t know what this means. I'm not sure how to feel about it. A lot of need exists in the world, and it's important to acknowledge the privilege of intentional frugality. […]
There’s a reason you’re a Plutus Award finalist this year. Just sayin. ????
Angela, you’re always so kind! Thanks. <3
I’ve been ruminating on this quite a bit as well. I am so privileged to be able to choose where and how to spend my money. Yes, I have done okay with generally working hard and being a good student, but I’ve also been handed a lot of things that have made life smoother and easier. It truly isn’t as simple as “just spend less” or “just move to a smaller place to save money” for so many in this country. Income is complicated; it’s not only based on how hard you can work. While it often is futile to complain about one’s circumstances, people also can’t just pull themselves up out of poverty without some serious reworking of the system. Thanks for the thoughtful post. I know I need to up my giving, even as I’m exercising more privilege to quit my regular job to pursue my passion job.
Right? There’s a lot that I’ve done well, and there’s even more that was a gift to me from life’s circumstances. And I came from a really complicated background (we made a crap ton of money, but we also lived in a couple different shelters when I was a kid), so it’s hard to always reconcile this narrative I have with myself to the reality of my circumstances.
On a more fun note, quitting your regular job to pursue a passion one is so exciting! You’ll have to keep me posted as things move forward.
I’ve been shifting our budget several times a year, every year, for … well, as long as I’ve held a job 😀 I’m ok with that. For me, it means things aren’t stagnant and that’s good.
One thing I’ve struggled with isn’t acknowledging that we’re wealthy (we travel, we have childcare, we give, we buy FACIAL TISSUES, we are !!!! wealthy).
I’m trying to reconcile the fact that we’re wealthy with the feeling that we’re not. After I’ve taken our required savings cut, we spend every other penny and there’s nothing extra. It makes me feel poor in the sense that after we take care of all the bills, we can have a few wants but we have to be careful to pick and choose still.
We have savings, but aren’t allowed to spend any savings because that’s absolutely sacrosanct right now – I don’t know how long I have to be capable of earning income. I can’t dig into that money for any reason. So it’s a very funny feeling! It doesn’t really matter, though. We’re still going to stick with the program, try to make responsible choices for the future with how and where we spend our money.
Facial tissues are the epitome of wealth!!!
I feel like you’re in a unique position regarding you’re health, too. That would make mindset shifting (and potentially harmful to your future self). I hadn’t considered this conversation from a disabilities point of view, although, that would add quite a bit of nuance to the conversation. I’m certain. And for you, it definitely has. Thanks for that point of view. It’s really important to know that one size fits all money advice doesn’t work, and isn’t applicable to a lot of people.
It’s tough for me to keep realizing that I’m not as poor as I feel. Not by a long shot. In fact, I have a very healthy income — and that means I need to be giving more. But I’m still in this “poor” mindset (which is also a poor mindset) because I’m still getting used to not having to account for/cover my now-ex-husband’s spending.
Even when he was around, we saved a fair amount, but now that he’s gone… Well, I have plenty left over each month and I really need to start donating more and remembering my privilege. Generally, I only remember it when I get my check, pay my bills and compute my savings rate for the month. Then I feel overwhelmed by it and grateful for it. The rest of the month, I’m on a self-imposed budget. So I don’t feel like I have a ton of money to spare. It’s a false narrative though — albeit a useful one for saving purposes — and I have to keep that in mind.
YES! I also have a false narrative, that I’m working to take myself out of. We save an EXTENSIVE amount of money, and I feel like we have nothing, which makes it harder to give as well. Now, we’re saving slightly less, but we’re giving more. And I still feel like we’re living on next to nothing. But at least where our money is going is more equitable compared to our privilege. IT’s a huge mindset shift.
I am SO glad you wrote this post. This issue is one I struggle with as someone who is pursuing FI. On the one hand, I’m more than willing to devote endless time researching various strategies to minimize my taxes and max my savings in the hopes of reaching FI earlier and earlier. On the other, I’m feeling guilty that I’m in such a privileged position to engage in this kind of self serving behavior. I see some of my co-workers making a lower salary than myself and supporting a family of six, while sending money back home to their parents or siblings in other countries. And I can only imagine how many other families there are in our country doing just the same. Your point is all too true- not everyone has the privilege or capability to save like we do, and not everyone has the choice to “live poor.” I also do not have a solution to the problem yet. But I do think that starting and keeping the conversation going is a wonderful first step, so thank you.
Elise
Yes! There’s this huge pull I feel as well. To feel almost bad for the things I have and the things I’ve worked for. And it’s overwhelming when I think about the misfortunes of others. I think I might write more on this in the future, about the guilt money has the potential to bring. I can “live poor” because I have excess money. And it keeps me away from disaster. But not everyone can. I don’t know a solution either, except to start having conversations.